"Mary Had a Baby" ... so what?

My latest article for Ministry Matters looks at how to make Advent and Christmas meaningful for children, by helping to understand how the Incarnation is still relevant today.

It also has a wicked cool picture of a Jesse tree icon.

My past catches up with me!

Hello, readers.

Some of you may have noticed some negative comments posted on a previous post of mine, disparaging my conduct in a previous job I held.

Needless to say, these posts are lies and/or irrelevant.  I don't want to delete them because I don't want to look as though I have anything to hide.  I was the victim of bullying at a previous job of mine, which my current boss is fully aware of and fully sympathetic to.  I have worked hard to try and move past the experience, but the petty and shallow behaviour of some of the people involved seems to have followed me here.

One of them mentioned in their post that Christians are supposed to "forgive" people.  To be the better person.

This reminds me of something in my mother's book, Learning to Love.  How do you forgive someone who hasn't said they're sorry?  Who hasn't acknowledged the hurt they've caused you?  Can you break ties with someone and forgive them at the same time?  She points out that Jesus says you must ask forgiveness before your Father can give it to you - without acknowledgement of wrongdoing, true FORGIVENESS - the reparation of a relationship - cannot happen.  Making peace with the hurt someone has caused you is a different thing - forgiving someone in your own heart is different from forgiving and repairing a relationship.  I have moved on in my own life, to a job where I feel as though I am appreciated, where I am thriving, where I am making a difference.  I find it sad that people would follow me to this blog three years after the events and try to defame my character.  But I am no longer eaten up with bitterness and hatred as I was three years ago.  And for that, I have Father Michael and Father Robert to thank, who have shown me such support and welcome in my ministry at St. George's, as well as all the parents, who have entrusted me with their children and welcomed me into their lives.

I'm sorry for anyone who has come across these posts and hope that they will not distract you from the main purpose of this blog, which is to share ideas and experiences on the topics of children's ministry and children's spirituality.

I pray for all who have been victims of bullying, and for all who are bullies, that all may come together in love in God's kingdom.

Service and pastoral care.

I've been stressing out a lot lately on how to start doing service projects with the older Sunday School kids.  We have very few teenagers at St. George's, but we have a large number of 9- to 11-year-olds, and I'm working on slowly turning them into their own "clique" (in a good way), so that when they outgrow Sunday School, we'll have a ready-made youth group ready for them.

A lot of them are very enthusiastic about raising money for charities - we had a child who raised over £120 with a bake sale for Children in Need - but I want them to know more than just fund-raising.  I want to do hands-on projects with them.  But I don't want to do it in a way that is patronising ("hey, kids, let's go meet some poor people and help them!"), and I don't want to do it in a way that gets in the way of actual skilled charity workers doing their actual skilled work.  My experience volunteering with the Children's Mission of St. Paul and St. James showed me that well-meaning groups of teenagers from the suburbs can actually be more hassle than they're worth - the staff know what they're doing, and when the teenagers come to "help with a programme for inner-city kids," the staff ends up having to babysit the clueless teenage helpers as well as do the actual programme.  Sometimes, what's needed is for people to just give money and let the people who know what they're doing get on with the work.

But that can lead to isolation - children in wealthy areas of Kensington sending money off to charities without any real contact with people who are different from them, or people who are suffering.  The desire to "help" can become insular or even smug, and disconnected from any sense of the realities of other people's lives, or the feeling that real love involves getting in the trenches with people as well as sharing resources with them.

Martin (our new Administrator) and I went to a course on "Power, Poverty and the Church" last week, which advocated for a relational model of service as opposed to a noblesse oblige model or a procedural/bureaucratic model.  That the way to give people not just aid but agency and power over their own lives is to build relationships with them first and then to see what they need and help empower them to gain it.  The idea of starting with relationship has helped to sort out some of these issues.  Possibly we could get in touch with a church in a deprived area and start a youth group together - an arts group, or a sports group (or both), and work on creating relationships between the young people and seeing where that leads us.  Perhaps we could open a youth club in the community space one or two afternoons per week, focusing at first solely on getting to know people, and then on serving their needs.  Perhaps we could visit a domestic violence shelter around Christmas and focus not on giving (we'd bring a donation of toys but that wouldn't be the main event) but just on sharing time and activities together.

And I can't forget to grab the pastoral opportunities that arise in normal church life and share them with the kids.  A child in our Sunday School is ill and has been hospitalised for the last week (she's home now), and so I've amended our Sunday School lesson plan for this week to include making a Get Well card for her.  That's an act of service that comes out of an existing relationship, and the kids will take the lead on it.  It's a start.

Happy All Saints' Day (Eve)!

Eleanor (Boo) O'Neill, acolyting at our All Saints' Sunday All-Age Eucharist, with the banner made by our children at our All Saints' Family Day on Saturday.  It shows St. George, our patron.  Each year, we'll make one more banner of a saint, so each year the "cloud of witnesses" we carry in procession with us on All Saints' Day is greater!

Bread!

A few parents have requested this recipe, so here it is.

This is the bread we bake together on all our Family Days, and sometimes at other occasions such as Harvest, Holy Week, etc.  Bread can symbolise the Body of Christ, the lifegiving death of the fruits of the harvest (a natural metaphor for the Body of Christ!), and our communal life together.

It's virtually foolproof - even if the water is too hot and the yeast doesn't proof as well as it should, and it doesn't really rise, as happened at our All Saints' Family Day yesterday, it still tastes good!

2 cups warm water
1 package yeast
1/4 cup oil
1/4 cup honey (use the same measuring cup, right after the oil - the honey will slide right out of it!)
2 teaspoons salt
Flour (as much as is needed to turn it to dough - about seven cups - and more for kneading and shaping)

Mix the ingredients together, and then knead.  Set the dough to rise for at least two hours, in a warm, moist place.

Punch the risen dough down, and cover a workplace with flour.  Sprinkle a little extra flour on top of the dough.  The dough can then be shaped - encourage children to think of an appropriate shape for the occasion.

When you've shaped the dough, set it to rise again, then brush it with egg or oil, and bake.  Smaller sculptures can bake in about 20 minutes at 190C, while larger ones may take up to 45.

Here are some examples of how you can shape the dough (these are my own work, not kids' work).

An angel, at Christmas.

A sheaf of wheat, at Easter.

At first glance, this looks like a bunny, but it's actually Jonah and the whale..  The ear-like structures are the whale's tail.  Jonah is visible at the far right, being spat out.

If Jesus had had MY job, the Gospels might look like THIS.

I first published this on my personal blog almost a year ago, and it still rings true, so I thought I'd share it with you!

* * * * * *

And it came to pass that it was Tuesday, and the Toddler Craft Group did meet in the Community Space. So Jesus went forth to the community space, and he did set up the paint and the glitter and the clay and the toys and the tea and the coffee and the biscuits and the banana. And the toddlers came unto the community space with their nannies and their mothers, and they did stick their hands in the paint and create an enormous mess. And Jesus did bless the children, saying, "that is exactly the point of this craft group, but my goodness, it doth make a mess."

And the toddlers sat in a circle, with their nannies and their mothers, and they did sing "The Wheels on the Bus" and "This Little Light of Mine," and they did play upon the rattles and the bells and the castanets. And the nannies and the mothers helped with the clean-up as best they could, but soon after, they departed, back to their own homes. And Jesus did then have to take DOWN the paint and the glitter and the clay and the toys and the tea and the coffee and the biscuits and the banana, and return the Community Space to the condition wherein he had found it. And he did cry out, "O Lord, why didst thou make paint so difficult to remove from teacups???" This was to fulfill the prophecy, as it was written, "my servant shall be covered in paint, yea, even up to his very elbows. But I will rejoice in him and make him great and shall give unto him the last Jaffa Cake to reward him for his tribulations."

Soon after, it was a Sunday morning, and Jesus did approach the Central Line, to go from Leyton to Notting Hill Gate. And lo, there were delays upon the Central Line, both upon its eastbound trains and upon its westbound trains. And Jesus did arrive at Notting Hill Gate, and lo, there were many tourists. And the crowd of tourists pressed upon Jesus as he approached the escalator, and Jesus' disciples said to him, "Master, why do you not curse these tourists, for they are blocking the escalator?" And Jesus said, "Truly, I say unto you, these tourists are as lost lambs. For they are not Londoners and they do not know that you are supposed to stand on the right of the escalator and leave the left side free for people to walk past." And then God sent an impatient woman with a toddler to the escalator, and she spoke out against the tourists, and the tourists did part and let the woman with the toddler through upon the left side of the escalator. And Jesus did follow her, and pass up the escalator on dry land.

As it was approaching the feast of February Half-Term, the twelve Sunday School teachers did say unto Jesus, "behold - half-term draws near, and we must withdraw to the Swiss Alps or the Canary Islands for a holiday with our families." And Jesus did look at the Sunday School rota and did despair, for the last Sunday of Half-Term was empty. And one Sunday School teacher said to Jesus, "Master, I am not going to the Swiss Alps or the Canary Islands, so I shall take upon myself the burden of teaching that Sunday." And Jesus said, "behold, this Sunday School teacher is a true son of Abraham, and has brought salvation this day. For blessed are they who volunteer when everyone else is away on holiday, somewhere sunny, with little fruit cocktails and warm sand, while we remain behind to freeze and get rained upon and suffer yet more delays on the Central Line."

This is the word of the Lord.

Prayer with children part II.

I've experimented with different forms of intercession when praying with children, and I've found the following to be very effective (with instructions beforehand that children can pray out loud or in their hearts).  The children don't often say prayers out loud, but they get very intent and quiet and focused.

It introduces the different types of prayer, as well as broadly following the structure of the intercessions that happen in church.

You can add "Lord in your mercy / Hear our prayer" or "Lord, hear us / Lord., graciously hear us" between each petition if you like.


If there's anything you want to say thank you for, you can bring it to God.



If there's anything you want to say sorry for, you can bring it to God.


If there's anything that's making you scared, or worried, or sad, you can bring it to God.


If there's anything you want to ask God's help for, you can bring it to God.


If there's anybody you know who is ill, or having a problem, you can remember their name before God, knowing that he will give them strength and help.


And if there's anybody you know - a grandparent, a parent, a friend, a pet, or anyone else - who has died, you can remember their name before God, knowing that he has given them new life in his kingdom, where they will live forever, where there is no sadness or pain or death, and where God himself will wipe away all tears from our eyes.


Merciful Father, accept these prayers for the sake of your son, our saviour Jesus Christ.


Amen.

The sacrifice of Isaac.

We're doing the story of the sacrifice of Isaac in Sunday School this week.  It raises the difficult question many Sunday School leaders struggle with - which scary parts of the Bible to present to children, and which to hide.  I have the impulse to present only the stories that are easy to understand, only the ones that present God as loving and kind, the ones in which no anti-Semitism could be implied, the ones which have not been seized upon by the Religious Right as their property and theirs alone.  And I know that I can't give in to that impulse.

Because to take out the scary stuff and the hard stuff means that we're left with a story that has no power, but rather a pre-digested piece of feel-good mush, which our kids will rightly reject.  I know this, theoretically, and am comfortable with it around the stories of the crucifixion, the prophesies of the Coming Kingdom, and the story of the Exodus.  But with some of the lesser-known stories, I debate whether to include them at all, and if so, which details to include (is it enough that Esther saves her people, or should Haman be hung on the gallows he built for Mordecai?  Usually I go with the latter, but I always look at the most sensitive child in my group and wonder if I'm doing the right thing).

We have a window in our church of the sacrifice of Isaac.  For Christians, it prefigures the passion of Christ - God spared Abraham's son but did not flinch from offering his own.  It has a potent place in our cultural imagination, and to leave it out would deprive children of a crucial part of the story of the patriarchs.

But it's fraught with difficulties.  How far do you go?  Do you give five-year-old children the image of a parent standing over a beloved child, wielding a knife?  Will they process it in the safe, healthy way they process gruesome images from fairy tales (wolf swallows granny) or in the possibly terrifying way they process news stories that scare them?  Which details am I editing out for the sake of the children, and which am I editing out in my squeamishness?  Am I scared of offending parents if I don't sanitise all the scary bits out of the Bible, and do I give into that desire to the detriment of the kids?

I don't have the answers.  My general rule of thumb is to ask, "what does this story contribute to the story of salvation, the overall arc of the Bible?" and then use that to decide a) whether to include it in our curriculum this year, and b) which parts of it are most important.  But I'd be interested to hear from others how you handle this issue.

Mea culpa.

I'm sorry this blog has been inactive for so long - it's been an emotional few weeks at St. George's, with some unexpected funerals, on top of being shortstaffed.  So my brain hasn't really been in gear.  I'll update again in the next few days.

However, we're now on Twitter - so if you're there, come check us out at @StGeorgeCampden .

And I have a lovely photo to share with you.  While I personally am in favour of children receiving communion from baptism, St. George's isn't ready for that yet - we welcome children to Holy Communion either at Confirmation or at a younger age with due preparation.  This means many of our children receive a blessing at the altar.  Here is Father Michael blessing four-year-old Edward:

St. John Chrysostom

Today is the feast day of St. John Chrysostom.  His Easter Sermon was included in the Easter Vigil when I was growing up, and I have successfully used it in various Holy Week/Easter celebrations with children.

Last year, we had lots of kids absent for Easter itself (away on holiday) and so we had an Easter celebration on our first day of Sunday School after Easter.  We started at the bottom of the stairwell going up to our Sunday School room, where I told the story of Creation.  We then moved up the stairwell to the landing, where I told the story of the Red Sea.  The other teacher and I held a piece of blue cloth across the stairs and the children pushed their way through it.  We then sat at the top of the stairs, where I told the story of the Dry Bones (using the feltboard) and how God sent prophets and kings and teachers to help the people follow God's laws, and how he finally sent Jesus to live among us, and to share our life.  I told them how Jesus preached good news to the poor, how he made miracles happen and how he cured people who were sick.  I talked about how Jesus' enemies were afraid of him, that they were afraid he was going to take away their power.  I talked about how they arrested him, told lies about him, and put him to death on the cross.

And then I read part of the sermon that follows.  The "Christ is risen! / He is risen indeed!" bit at the end was done responsively, back and forth between me and the children - and at the end of the sermon, I pressed "Play" on the CD player and the Hallelujah Chorus started playing as I flung open the door to the Sunday School room ... which was covered in flowers, lit candles, our "Alleluia!" banner from Easter Sunday, and had a table groaning with cake and sweets in the centre of it.

We feasted and partied for about 15 minutes and then decorated candles for the children who were getting confirmed two weeks later.  It was a wonderful session.  You could do it on Holy Saturday as a children's service around sunset, or expand the drama bit (look to the readings from the Easter Vigil for inspiration) and surround it with artistic activities and worship and singing together to make a two or three-hour Saturday afternoon programme.

Here's the sermon.  Italics indicate what I cut.  These kids were between 6 and 9.  Older kids could probably handle the whole thing.

Whoever is devout and a lover of God, come, enjoy this beautiful and radiant Feast of Feasts!

Whoever is a good and faithful servant, rejoice, and enter into the joy of your Lord.

Whoever is weary of fasting, receive now your recompense.

All who have labored from the first hour, let them today receive their just reward. Those who have come at the third hour, with thanksgiving let them keep the feast. Those who have arrived at the sixth hour, let them have no misgivings; for they shall suffer no loss. Those who have delayed until the ninth hour, let them draw near without hesitation. Those who have arrived even at the eleventh hour, let them not fear on account of their delay.

For the Lord is gracious, and receives the last even as the first; he gives rest to the one who comes at the eleventh hour, just as to the one who has labored from the first. He has mercy upon the last, and cares for the first; to the one he is just, and to the other he is merciful. He both honors the work, and praises the intention.

Enter all of you, therefore, into the joy of our LORD, and whether first or last receive your reward. O rich and poor, one with another dance for joy! O you zealous and you negligent, celebrate the Day! You that have fasted, and you that have disregarded the fast, rejoice today! The table is rich-laden, feast royally, all of you! The calf is fatted; let no one go forth hungry!

Let all partake of the Feast of Faith. Let all receive the riches of goodness.

Let none lament their poverty, for the Universal Kingdom has been revealed.

Let none mourn their transgressions, for Pardon has dawned from the Tomb!

Let no one fear Death, for the Saviour’s death has set us free!

He that was taken by Death has annihilated it! He descended into Hell, and took Hell captive! Hell was embittered when it tasted his flesh, and, anticipating this, Isaiah proclaimed, "Hell was embittered when it encountered thee in the lower regions."

It was embittered, for it was abolished! 

It was embittered, for it was mocked!

It was embittered, for it was purged!

It was embittered, for it was despoiled!

It was embittered, for it was bound in chains!

It laid hold of a mortal body, and found that it had seized God!

It laid hold of earth, but confronted heaven!

It seized what it saw, but crumbled before what it had not seen!

O Death, where is they sting? O Hell, where is thy victory?

Christ is risen, and Hell is overthrown!

Christ is risen and the demons are fallen!

Christ is risen, and the angels rejoice!

Christ is risen, and life reigns!

Christ is risen and not one dead remains in the tombs!” 

For Christ being raised from the dead has become the first-fruits of them that slept. To him be glory and dominion through all the ages of ages! 

Christ is risen!

He is risen indeed!

Christ is risen!!!

He is risen indeed!!!

CHRIST IS RISEN!!!!!!!

HE IS RISEN INDEED!!!!!

Harvest Festival

Many churches have All-Age Eucharists at their Harvest Festivals.  We'll be trying the following idea at ours:

Before the service, pieces of paper shaped like seeds, along with pens and markers, will be placed in all the pews.  At the end of the intercessions (which will be written and read by the children), the congregation will be given time to write or draw a prayer of their own on their seed-shaped piece of paper.  During the Offertory, the seed prayers will be collected and brought to the front.  They will be blessed, and the President will pray that these seeds of ours will "grow and bear fruit."

I'm not sure exactly where they'll go - whether they'll be planted in the church garden, and decay, and provide nutrition for the soil and the living things - or whether they'll be added somehow to the displays of wheat and fruit that adorn the Harvest altar, or some third option I haven't thought of yet.  If you have any ideas for this part, let me know!

Creation.

We start the new programme year with the Creation story, and every year it makes me anxious.

The media is constantly full of stories of Creationists and New Atheists butting heads with each other, and the whole thing makes me nervous.  Are kids going to think we're a Creationist church?  Are the parents?  If I hedge the telling of the story with enough qualifications, will they understand the concept of myth and metaphor?  If I hedge the telling of the story with too many qualifications, will I destroy their ability to work out the concepts of myth and metaphor for themselves?  If I present it as fact and they later find out about evolution, will they throw out EVERYTHING they learned in church?  If I present it as myth, will they assume that EVERYTHING in the Bible is "just a story"?

It's enough to drive me crazy.

But strangely, the children don't seem to have a problem with it.  Their delight in the repetition - "And God saw that it was good.  And there was evening and there was morning ...", their joy at seeing the world created bit by bit, brought out of nothingness by the exuberant creative spirit of God, is untouched by all the grown-up nonsense that surrounds them.  They know that God made the world, and they know, from school, that animals have developed adaptations to their habitats, and they don't yet see a conflict between those two ideas.

I wish all adults could be so sensible.

I've settled for telling the story, pretty much straight, using the Genesis text almost verbatim, but I do throw the question, "I wonder if God is still making the world" into our post-story discussion.  Just in case any of the kids are anxious about it too.

But that's not the direction they took with the question yesterday.  Instead they used that question to adamantly insist that God was involved not only with the initial act of creation however many billions of years ago, but also in the individual creation of each individual person now.  One child was envisioning God putting people together in space and shooting them down to earth to be born.

I also asked them why God made the world.  Maybe he was lonely, they suggested.  Maybe he was bored.  One child, who had been fidgeting and seeking attention through most of the lesson said, "maybe he wanted people to share the Holy Spirit with."

Maybe he did.

Disney Princesses.

Having just read Peggy Orenstein's wonderful book, Cinderella Ate My Daughter, I've been thinking of the central role played by princesses in little girls' imaginations.

Now, I have no problems with princesses qua princesses.  Stories like Cinderella and Snow White provide a rich variety of imagery symbolic of the transition from childhood to adulthood.  I have a problem with extreme gender stereotypes masquerading as science, I have a problem with aggressive marketing to children, I have a problem with girls not being allowed to be anything BUT a princess, and I have a problem with Disney's blandification of classic fairy tales (see: The Little Mermaid - in the original, she loses the prince but gains a soul. Try finding THAT in the anorexic Ariel we're all familiar with).  But these are all for another time.

What's occurred to me is that you can find a few princesses in the Bible.  And we should make sure we stock little girls' imaginations with THESE characters as well as with Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, and Snow White.  Don't do it at the expense of the non-princess women - Sarah, Rachel, Leah, Rebecca, Miriam, Hannah, Deborah, Ruth, Mary, Elizabeth, Mary Magdalene, etc. - but there's no harm in throwing your little girls a crown or two among all the shawls and headscarves.

A couple words of warning:
1. Don't try to make ALL women princesses, by going all precious and saying, "but all girls are special princesses to God!"
2. Don't Google "Bible princesses," if you value your sanity, your eyeballs, or your faith in humanity.  Just don't.

Here are a few suggestions:

Do you teach the story of Moses in the bulrushes to your preschoolers?  Do you make a point out of mentioning Pharaoh's Daughter?  She was a princess - who, out of compassion, disobeyed her father's cruel edict and saved a life, treating the reviled foreigner's child as though it were her own.  That's not bad for a princess story.  When we acted this story out as part of our first summer programme, the girls loved making crowns and jewellery for Pharaoh's daughter to wear onstage - and loved acting out the scene where Miriam and Pharaoh's daughter conspire to save Moses's life.

What about Queen Esther?  The humble girl from nowhere marries Prince Charming, but the story is anything but happy ever after.  Instead, there are death threats, banquets, back-room scheming, a queen's bravery, and a happy ending.  Jenny Koralek's re-telling, with Grizelda Holderness' beautiful illustrations, is an excellent version of this story.


If you're brave enough to tell the story of the Coming Kingdom as part of your pre-school curriculum (we do), highlight the wedding imagery.  We, the people of God, are the princess, the beloved Bride of Christ, and the Kingdom of God is a marriage feast where we get to cast off our scullery maid clothes and put on beautiful white gowns, and which is the beginning of our happily ever after.

To Be A Pilgrim.

Summer Programme was fantastic.  We had five kids (and one more who came only on Tuesday, as that was the only day she was free), and they were all full of energy and creativity.

For those of you who haven't read the plans, you can find them here.  At the request of the kids, we added a treasure hunt to Friday's plans, and also did a voice recording of the script we wrote, as it was too hard for the kids to read AND manipulate the puppets at the same time.  So we made a very cool recording, complete with sound effects, and I just pressed "play" at the appropriate time, with pauses for all the songs.  We sang "He Who Would Valiant Be" at the start of the show, "One More Step Along The World I Go" halfway through, and finished with "Guide Me, O Thou Great Redeemer."

Here are some photo highlights of the week. Click on any of the photos to enlarge them.

Every day started with free play in the community space.  There were markers and paper available, as well as a book corner and spiritually imaginative toys.  The kids ignored the toys and played Hangman for the first few days, but got into the toys by Tuesday or Wednesday.

We then had morning worship and watched that day's segment of Dangerous Journey, the BBC's adaptation of Pilgrim's Progress.  The kids were sceptical at first, but were soon asking to rewatch their favourite parts!

For the rest of the day, we made puppets, or decorated our set, or played drama games, or had lunch and played outside.

At the end of the week, we had the puppet show!

We made our voice recording first.

Christian arrives at the wicket gate, despite being shot at!

Christian visits the Interpreter's House.

Christian is rid of his burden and receives his parchment.

Christian fights with Apollyon.

Christian walks through the Valley of the Shadow of Death.

Christian and Faithful visit Vanity Fair.

Faithful is tried by Lord Hategood.

Christian and Hopeful are captured by Giant Despair.

Christian and Hopeful are entangled in a net by the Flatterer.

Christian and Hopeful arrive at the Celestial City ...

... and are welcomed by Shining Ones with trumpets!

The puppeteers take a bow!

Seminar Update - third speaker confirmed!

The third speaker for our seminar on Children's Spirituality in November will be Gretchen Wolff Pritchard.  Gretchen is the author of Offering the Gospel to Children, the founder of The Sunday Paper and Beulah Enterprises, and an internationally renowned Christian educator.  She also happens to be my mother, which explains why she's flying across the Atlantic for a grand total of 48 hours.

So our full lineup is:

Dr. Rebecca Nye, speaking on "Children's spirituality - what is it and what can parents do?"

Gretchen Wolff Pritchard, speaking on the Christian story and how children understand it.

Victoria Goodman, speaking on techniques for building children's spirituality at home.

The day will also include a chance to tour the children's areas at St. George's and to play with our toys!  Email margaret@stgeorgescampdenhill.co.uk for tickets and information!

Pray and Play area is live!

We now have a "Pray and Play" area in the church for the under-5's.

Previously, our community space was available for parents who needed to take their children out of the service, but this caused several problems. First of all, it didn't help the children to actually engage with the service - they were still expected just to sit still and be quiet in church, and if they misbehaved, they were removed. This sends the wrong message to children, telling them they are a distraction rather than a welcome part of the congregation.

Secondly, the community space has only secular toys in it. This didn't help create "sacred space" for the children.

Finally, the community space is at the back of the church. This means that parents who wanted to be prepared for having to take their children out needed to sit at the back. This meant the children were all clustered at the back. They couldn't see the altar, could hardly hear what was happening, and spent the whole time they were in church staring at the backs of adults' heads.

So we've made a welcoming space for children by the font - this will be available over the summer while there is no creche for the under-5's. If this experiment is successful, we will make this space permanent. There will still be a creche during the service, but the Pray and Play area will be available for the beginning and end of the service when the children are in church with their parents, and for any visiting children who don't feel comfortable going to the creche yet.

Now, I got a brilliant camera on sale yesterday (it was a £200 camera and I got it for £70 - woo-hoo!), so I've taken some photos of the space. I'm still figuring out the settings, so a few of these photos are weirdly dark, but you'll still get the general idea of the Pray and Play space.

A general overview of the space. Chairs and a pew are available around the edge of it, so parents can accompany their children. We have a variety of toys and books, all at child height, as well as a small altar with a cross, a chalice and paten, and a Madonna and Child icon similar to the one on the church's chancel.

All the toys are quiet - none have bells or electronic noises that could be distracting. They are all made of natural materials. They all have potential for imaginative play, i.e., none of them can only be played with in one particular proscribed way. They relate both to STORY and to LITURGY.

A child's-eye view of the space, from the entry point.

Based on an idea found on the Spiritual Child Network's website, I've created flags for the children to hold at various points in the service. These flags have clear visual cues showing them what is happening at that point in the service. The children in the pictures are a mix of races and genders. From the top row, L to R, the flags are: singing, listening, waving (for the beginning and end of the service, waving hello and goodbye), passing the peace, praying, and going to the altar rail.

The altar cloth is green, to match the season. If the Pray and Play area becomes permanent, the colour of the altar cloth will change to follow the liturgical year.

The chalice, paten, icon and cross are as close to unbreakable as possible, so children can play with them.
The space has a clear sightline to the altar, so parents and children can participate in worship and see what's happening.

Our "Liturgy Box" contains the Church Set from Beulah. This includes people, of a variety of ages, genders and races, a priest with a robe and chasuble, an altar, lectern, cross, candles, font, water, bread and wine, and altar book.

The laminated card in front of the baskets has a dual purpose - on the front is an image showing the child what that basket is all about. On the back is an itemised list of that basket's contents, so children and parents can tidy up when they're done playing, and so church staff can know quickly and easily if any items have gone missing!

We have several copies of "Let Us Pray," our service sheet for children, and markers. To the left of the picture, you can see (L to R) our Good Shepherd Basket, our Christmas Basket and our Creation Basket.
The contents of our Good Shepherd basket.

The Jesus doll. During the programme year, he goes home with a different child every week, to show them that Jesus goes with them out of church and into their daily lives. During the summer he'll live here. (This is available from Articles of Faith.)
The Easter basket contains lots of symbolic imagery of resurrection - butterfly and caterpillar finger puppets, a lamb puppet, a stuffed baby bird, and a rabbit puppet - as well as more concrete images from the Easter story, such as an angel, a palm cross, a crucifix, toy bread and grapes and a plate, and a donkey puppet.


A Big Book on the Eucharist is set up next to the altar. It has clear, simple photographs and text, showing the different parts of the service. (This is available from Pauline Books and Media.)


We have toys that stand on their own as well as the baskets.
We have a book corner, with books that are Bible stories, prayers, and allegories. Each book is age-appropriate and beautifully illustrated.
There is an information sheet for parents, giving them ideas on how to use the space.

If you want to know where we got any of our resources, feel free to ask in the comments!